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Kill Slumsley.
Obtain Knifey.
Defeat 9-Torg.
Take Knifey's advice and stab Gene in the gut.
Defeat Douglas.
Obtain Sweezy.
Use Sweezy to boss around the Office Moplets.
Defeat Krubis.
Obtain Gus.
Obtain the Jetpack.
Obtain Creature.
Defeat the Skrendel Brothers.
Obtain the Mag-Boots.
Defeat Dr. Giblets.
Pay your bill at Applebee's.
Spend 15 hours at the very real in-game alien strip club.
Defeat Nipulon.
Obtain Lezduit.
Say goodbye to Suit-O.
Playing Favorites
Defeat Garmantuous and take down the G3 cartel.
Juggle an enemy in the air with at least 5 shots.
Pop 20 Grunt eyeballs.
Watch Globo's rise to fame.
Discover the movie theater.
Sit through the entirety of the really annoying countdown show on TV.
Sequel-Bait
Unlock and explore every collectible warp base.
Find and open every Luglox chest.
Unlock every post in the Bounty Hunter forums.
Collect every trading card in the game.
Carried Stan's Load To Completion
Cardbored
Mux Ado About Shipping
We Came, We Chainsaw, We Conquered
Bathe With A Giant Nude Alien
Fall In Love With A Parasite
Meet Frasier from Frasier
See Salt
Porch Pirate
That's B.A.L.L., Folks
It's Like The Santa Clause
Harper? I Barely Know Her!
Give Away All Your Money